1 yr is coming to an end

its so funny re-reading the blog which i wrote almost a yr ago and so many things have changed over the past yr. it is almost 1 yr since u last blog and yes i have started my own family during this past 11 mths and a cute adorable new life has come to my house. he is call jun jie coz we wan him in future to be handsome and outstanding. he is now 2mths+, going to be 3mths coming 30 Oct.

yes time flies. i was demoted to be an assistant pencil lead and i excel in my job and did exactly wat i wrote previously - slog my guts out, dun care wat others say. office is still as messy with a re-org every 3mths, this did not change despite me away for 3mths for maternity and i will b going bk to work coming 9 nov. dont know wat to expect.

and my dear little son will be taken care of by the babysitter which we hired staying on the same block as us but on 1st storey. worried .. very worried.. coz she is not pro-breast feeding n i worry my son will not be fed breast milk as much as i want. but there's nth i can do, i need the salary to keep my family n parents going. w/o my contribution, everything will come to dead stale and i cant spend as i wish.

for the past 11mths, i tried to convince my parents come my hse stay, but it was a fruitless effort, they moved back immediately after the kitchen renovation was done. din even stayed till 2009 CNY. haiz wat a failure!!!

my brother drifted further apart from us and might be closing dwn his office coming dec 09. he is resentful to my sisters for failing to contribute to my parents income and only the 2 of us are contributing. i am also very resentful towards them. but beside feeling resentful abt tis, wat else can i do? so i decide to channel my unhappiness to spending more time with my parents and bringing my son back as much as i can. watever my sisters and brother cant do, i can only try my best to make it up to my parents in terms of quantity time spent with them.

mum went for a thyroid op in late sep n is now recovering at home. hopefully her health is back on track n both of my parents will live a long long life. dad is still diabetic, my rship with in laws are still very strain. their concern for me is still hot n cold, but the concern for their grandson has warm till desert hot since his arrival. i am grateful for their love for him. watever mummy cant get, at least he got it, so i m grateful they start to like my son.

my rship with my hubby juz break last wkend due to the continous strains from the in law and unhappiness of myself keep having to coup at home n nt able to fulfil my plans as planned. i believe our rship will cont to be so strainful n tiring n 1 day it will juz break forever. tis was wat we foresee during our pre-marriage course 3yrs ago. we r coming to our 4th yr marriage since 19 nov 05 (rom). 3 yrs since we lived together (19 nov 06) and then .. ? like that lo .. any more sparks in our life? i doubt so liao.. thats fast hoh . for the chemistry to be on vanishing ends ..haiz